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I also roped in two girlfriends based in London, who are also single, and in their 30s.They agreed to take on the world of online dating from home in the UK.The three of us had never had an issue with our age, until men on these sites started to highlight it – be it in messages, in conversation, or in their lock-down filters for girls under 29.This process has made me aware that women are often more accepting of age than men are.By end of week two, I had 62 ‘reasonable matches’ (people who were more than a 60% match).But this only happened because I extended the distance range to the whole of the US. With the men I did take a shine to, it felt like we had to take exams before we could actually obtain contact. Some of them may well have later fled to the Internet in the hope they’d find their wife: soft in character, tall, with model looks, joker, non-smoker, prays in tongues at least 45 minutes a day, preferably a virgin, never confronts but isn’t a pushover... I appreciate the need to have standards when it comes to finding a life partner, but not when we’re unwilling to look at ourselves, or the fear so clearly attached to so many requirements.After the painstaking process of answering 120 questions, I finally began to get matched.I had selected men in the age range 28–41, and was paired with quite a few.
Lesson one: online dating requires you to know what you want.
I would sign up to both secular and exclusively Christian websites, both paid and free, adding in the latest craze of ‘hook-up’ dating apps.
On every dating site or app I tried, I would clearly state that I was a Christian, and that spirituality was ‘very important’ to me.
But I was slightly disappointed with the options I was being given: too old, too young; too invested in believing in ‘the one’ rather than the best ones.
Too many were divorced and didn’t sound like they were healed from the last marriage.